(mouse clicking)
(typing)
(mouse clicking)
- Hey everybody, it's Perez Hilton
and you know I love me a good effin' laugh.
So I found this crazy girl's
dating ad online, and it's sick.
I'm all for expressing yourself
online, I do it every day, but you
have to be the shit to say this shit.
But I gotta give credit to Marsha for saying what she wants.
Not just saying it, laying it all out there.
Folks, let's watch Marsha's video.
(upbeat dance music)
♪ Are you watching, are you watching ♪
♪ We are watching, we are watching ♪
♪ Are you watching, we are watching ♪
♪ Are you watching television ♪
♪ Are you watching, Are you watching ♪
♪ We are watching, we are watching ♪
♪ Are you watching, we are watching ♪
♪ Television ♪
- Hi.
I'M Marsha Day, I'm 25, I work at
a local cafe and walk dogs, but those are just
temporary gigs, I'm actually an inspiring comics artist.
I'm single, looking for a quality man.
So if you're tall, handsome, went to an
ivy league, then you make it to the top of my list.
Ambition is important, so you can make
your own money and have your own house and car.
Now I like to spice things up
sexually, so you better be hot in bed.
I'm not looking for some lazy underwear model who
just lies there expecting me to do all the work.
That's a turn off.
And you better love animals and get along with Mr. Kitzy.
Now I'm not picky, but no druggies,
slackers, slobs, overweights, and those
still living with their parents, don't apply.
I don't have time for you.
(playful piano music)
- Hey sexy, I saw your ad, you still looking?
- I left you my info so you can contact me 24/7.
All day, all night.
- I'd do you, Marsha.
Anytime you want.
- I like fat girls.
(laughs)
- I get pussy all the time.
- No solid food, no meats, no drinking.
Get used to water, liquid tofu, morning fasting.
♪ I just want you to be true ♪
- My wife's big, it's no big deal to me.
- With that face I'd kill myself.
- People like a pretty girl, you know what I mean?
- She's so ugly!
(laughs)
- Are you a supermodel?
- I wouldn't let my son within two feet of you.
- Do us all a favor and just shut up.
- It's not like she's made any contribution
to science or advance the human race.
- Love big women!
I love taking a woman and just boom!
- This needs moderation.
Be polite or get off.
- I sense darkness.
- I like when big girls get what
they want, they're not ashamed of it.
- Looks, education, personality, they all matter.
- If I was a guy and said that I wanted a girl
with a huge rack, you'd all be cheering me on.
- Seriously?
What a hypocritical bitch.
- I'd like to thank my breasts.
- They hatin' on you 'cause you're a strong woman.
There's a pecking order and you're at the fugly end of it.
(lively piano music)
- This is Rick Bravos from Live 'N chat,
New York's best online watering hole.
You've probably seen by now the dating ad from Marsha Day.
It's going completely viral.
There is something so wrong with the picture here.
She's an overweight, underemployed woman
who works in a cafe and walks dogs, so maybe
makes 20 grand a year, looking for a handsome,
successful guy who is ivy league educated.
We've checked and Marsha's only a junior college graduate.
That is just the height of arrogance!
She's a fat, delusional chick
talking with a dick and some balls!
- Low fat soy, no foam, no sugar,
and an extra shot of espresso.
Hello?
You there?
- Yes you're highness, only the best for you.
You know what?
Coffee's on me, I'll make it piping hot just for you!
- Marsha, you can stop that.
- Why, I work hard.
- Just gave me your apron.
- Hey guys, it's Stella.
I just got back from a run, and during
my run I was thinking a lot about
Marsha's current situation and how as
young girls in today's society we
have so much pressure put upon ourselves.
- You know what, we all have body issue problems,
you don't need to start fat shaming her.
- There's no excuse for the hate and
fat shaming that is being thrown at this woman.
- And not only that, people are making
fun of her weight, and when you think
about it, that's literally the same thing
as making fun of someone for being gay or not.
- As someone who deals with weight issues
day to day, whatever, people need
to fucking worry about themselves.
I mean have you ever heard of a
little thing called water weight?
- (from laptop) And my initial thoughts are, who cares?
Good for you Marsha, go get what you want.
And face it, there's a double standard
in this world we live in.
If it was a guy who didn't exactly
fit the mold of society doing the
exact same thing, nobody would look twice.
But with Marsha it's a different story?
No.
Just look on TV for example.
If a bigger guy had a sexy wife or
a hot girl, I mean it's everywhere,
but when Marsha does it it's a problem?
You know what I say?
I say Marsha, do what you want.
♪ Satellites light up like diamonds in the sky ♪
(lively piano music)
- Let's give her a warm welcome on Live 'N Chat.
- Thanks Rick, I'm really excited to be here.
- Marsha, you are a sensation!
You have such a following, and who doesn't love Mr. Kitzy?
Did you expect any of this?
- No, I'm blown away with the outpour of support.
- I think your response was classy,
and thank you for sharing.
You changed my mind and I'm a big fan.
- Thanks, thanks Rick.
- No, really I am, now Marsha, you have become
very busy, you are a role model for body image,
a real voice for plus sized individuals.
- Well I wouldn't say that, Rick.
I'm not speaking for a whole population
here, I'm just doing my own thing.
But I do encourage belief in oneself.
- That is wise beyond your years.
Marsha, everybody wants to know about the dating front.
Do you have any news to share with us?
- Actually I've got so many offers I don't know what to do.
(Rick on phone) Listen, I don't have time for this
- No, I know.
- I'm busy too, I know.
Oh, hold on a second.
Hold on, hold on, Marsha you were great today.
Listen, there's someone that you must meet.
You wanna return her call.
Yes I'm here.
Listen, what do you...
- You just wanna hook some rich guy.
- Please keep this dog away.
Give her a banana.
- Marsha, you are a dumb bitch.
- [Troll] She's probably throwing up after meals now.
(laughs)
- [Second Troll] White trailer trash looking for attention.
- What are you watching?
- [Marsha] Nothing.
♪ She's only a bird in a gilded cage ♪
♪ A beautiful sight to see ♪
♪ And her beauty was sold for an old man's gold ♪
♪ She's a bird in a gilded cage ♪
♪ She's only a bird ♪
♪ She's only a bird in a gilded cage ♪
♪ A beautiful sight, a beautiful sight ♪
♪ A beautiful sight, a beautiful sight to see ♪
♪ I said a beautiful sight to see ♪
♪ You may think that she's happy ♪
♪ And free from all care ♪
♪ She's not what she seems to be, to be, to be, to be ♪
♪ 'Tis sad, 'tis sad, 'tis sad ♪
♪ When you think of her wasted life ♪
♪ For youth cannot mate with age ♪
♪ She's just a bird in a gilded cage ♪
- [Secretary] Sorry, are you sure?
Is she supposed to be here?
Hi, Tara Zhang's office, please hold.
- You should've seen Rick a few years ago.
He used to free up on camera,
get this nervous tick on his face.
I got him into facial relaxation exercises.
- Really?
- [Tara] Yeah.
He was like a weasel off the street when I first met him.
But look at him now.
- Sounds like you're a real star maker.
(laughs)
- Did you get a chance to look at my proposal?
Excellent.
I got big plans for you, Marsha.
(upbeat electronic music)
You're doing well.
Now the hard part, remember as part
of your contract, you need to lose weight.
- I know.
- And good news, we have our first endorsement.
You'll be on the Super Fat Blast program.
We'll be filming your progress, you need
to lose 30 pounds in three months.
- Hmm?
- They're expecting high results for their money.
And how's this for motivation, it's 10 grand per pound.
- Shit.
(rhythmic drumming) (mischievous piano music)
Oh my god guys, look at my new place!
Look at this!
Holy shit!
Oh my god!
Look at these appliances!
And oh look, he looks so good here!
Oh he's so cute!
And this is where I'm told I'm
gonna be doing my new channel.
Subscribe.
Look at this view.
Guys, I don't know about you, but this is beautiful.
I love you, Tara.
(loungey acoustic guitar music)
- [Tara] We'll need that in an extra large.
- [Designer] They don't make it in her size.
- Just take two, stitch them together.
Marsha, dial it back a bit.
Be natural, keep it personable.
- Gotcha, where should I look when I'm using the products?
For my best angle?
Hiya, it's me Marsha Day.
Welcome to my brand new channel, ME Day.
Without your love and support, ME Day would not be--
- Cut.
- Again?
Hiya, it's me Marsha Day!
Welcome to my brand new channel, ME Day.
- Cut.
- Hiya, it's me Marsha Day.
Welcome to my brand new channel, ME Day.
Without your love and support, ME Day would not be possible.
I'll be talking about health, self care,
wellbeing on this channel, including this
awesome weight loss program I discovered
called the Super Fat Blast Program.
Guys, I'm excited to blast away the flab!
- Marsha, you're so beautiful.
- Whatever, it's so obvious she's Photoshopped.
- That's why you have to discipline your children.
- There's nothing better than liquified chicken breast.
- You look so beautiful!
- I like that.
I wouldn't want you to fit on the couch.
I want you to be half on the couch, half on the floor.
This'll be your knee, I want you knee fat all over me.
You big...
I don't know why you're being so stupid.
But if you wanna lose weight, I'll let you.
And I'll design a program for you.
And I'll hurt you.
I'll hurt you so bad, and then I'll help you feel so good.
You're gonna love me.
You're gonna love me the way that I love you.
- Hiya, it's me, Marsha Day.
I love the summer, but when it gets hot I get all sticky.
No worries.
I recently discovered a new deodorant,
Misty Springs, that solves the summer sweat.
Let me say, I smell like roses all day long.
- Hiya, it's me Biba.
My mop, like Misty Springs, smells like roses all day long.
I bet yours does too, so keep on moping!
- Hiya, it's me Marsha, and I'm here to
support ya like this and sell you more stuff.
So subscribe!
- [Joey] Hi Marsha, I'm Joey.
I like long romantic walks.
- How come you're not on video?
You hiding something?
- [Zane] No, bad hair day.
- What do you do?
- [Zane] I'm in a band.
- Really?
Play something.
Zane?
(strums acoustic guitar)
♪ You think you know me ♪
♪ You got me all figured out ♪
♪ You try to box me in ♪
♪ Put me in a little box ♪
♪ All safely contained now ♪
♪ But I'm meant to wow ♪
♪ I'll punch through walls, I'll scale deep heights ♪
♪ And I'll chew my foot off to spring the trap ♪
♪ Those are my terms to liberty ♪
♪ I am more, more, more ♪
- [Zane] So I was wondering, you wanna
get coffee or something sometime?
I have a cat too.
They could go on a play date.
- Sure.
I'd like that.
Let me see your face.
Woo, hey guys, oh my god, I just went shopping!
(rock music)
♪ Fast embrace in an empty space ♪
♪ You have to fill with your love, now shake ♪
♪ Don't complain, it'll take all day ♪
♪ So be my man 'cause I'm hoping you're ♪
♪ Crazy ♪
♪ If you had a place to stay ♪
♪ Perhaps it'll be the same ♪
♪ Fast embrace in an empty space ♪
♪ You have to fill with your love, now shake ♪
♪ Don't complain, it'll take all day ♪
♪ So be my man 'cause I'm hoping you're ♪
♪ Crazy ♪
- Thank you so much, Marsha!
I'm your biggest fan!
- [Marsha] Angel, oh Angel, cool name!
All right, um...
(crowd clamoring)
Sure.
(phone buzzing)
- No, she decided to stop for some fans.
Yes sir, understood.
Tell her that we're on our way okay?
Copy that.
Miss Day, I do have to insist,
the director's not gonna like this.
- I have to go.
One more, one more picture.
All right, one more picture.
(cheering)
- What are you wearing?
- She probably doesn't even use
any of those products in real life.
- Do us a favor Marsha and kill yourself.
- Hey friends, I am having so much fun watching Marsha!
It's like being on a cray-cray-crazy train.
You know you're big when you're shilling deodorant.
She's plugging everything, and probably everyone.
Not caring where she makes the
money from, she is cashing in.
Some say that's greedy, I say that's smart.
Being famous is fun, but it is hard work
and Marsha is like a hooker in heat!
I wanna hear from you.
Leave me a comment in the comments section.
Do you think Marsha is overexposed?
- As you know, I have been a
Marsha supporter all along, okay?
Team Marsha, but lately it feels
like her message is so skewed, like with
every single unboxing video she does and ad,
it just feels like her subscribers are rising,
and fame sells, and we worship it.
(rock music)
(ChitChat call ringing)
- Hi, are you Will?
- Hey Marsha, yeah it's me.
Were you expecting someone else?
- No.
It's nice to meet you.
- Yeah, you too.
(fanciful xylophone music)
- I used to live somewhere over there.
- Do you miss there?
- No.
- What's the worst thing that's
happened to you since you've been here?
- I have a manager who's...
- I used to have psychotic bosses
when I worked as a trader.
You swim with the sharks long enough.
- [Marsha] You ever miss it?
- Sometimes.
The money.
- [Marsha] Why leave?
- The recession.
What I do now is so much better.
I help people with their health and fitness.
I help people transform.
(enchanting piano music)
(Marsha giggles)
For the traveling you.
Go ahead.
Throw it in the river.
- I wanna keep it.
- I'll make you more, silly.
(funk music)
- [Marsha] Say hello to the camera.
- Hi.
We were just napping.
(Marsha laughs)
Don't spit in my face.
- [Marsha] He's getting excited.
- I know
She's gorgeous.
I know.
I'm so lucky.
We have to have a heart to heart.
I can't have you laying around
the apartment all day, not paying rent.
Okay?
(Marsha laughs)
- [Marsha] Be nice to the cat.
- Listen, I'm sick of it.
I'm sick of it.
He does not put in, all he does is eat and sleep.
I can't stay mad at him.
Look at that face, I cannot stay mad at that!
♪ Breakdown ♪
♪ Go out and make a new boogie ♪
♪ Shake down ♪
♪ Makeout ♪
- Will and Mr. Kitzy.
- Marsha, you're holding out on us.
We wanna hear about Will!
Come on Live 'N Chat ASAP and dish.
How did you meet, but really, how did you catch him?
Any secret tips?
Come and share all the juicy details.
- Sorry, it was just so unlikely, you know?
- You and Will are too cute together.
- It's almost like I'm there with the two of you.
- Will's not really into you.
He's just using you to get famous.
♪ Go out and make a new boogie ♪
♪ Shakedown ♪
♪ Makeout ♪
♪ Break down ♪
♪ Go out and make a new boogie ♪
(speaking softly)
- Yes, I know you're all wondering.
I lost five pounds.
It's all about loving your body.
I'm taking care of my health now.
Ladies, I love the new me.
Try the Super Fat Blast Program.
I guarantee it works.
(hip hop music)
- Mr. Kitzy.
You want some caviar?
(laughs)
Yes Rick.
Oh it is tough to make it in this country.
I'm entering a phase in my career
where I just wanna give back.
Maybe I'll start a charity.
For the poor.
Like nuns do.
- Hi Marsha, how are you?
Nice fur.
Did you kill it yourself?
(gasps)
- [Marsha Fan] Oh my God!
- This coat was made in America.
I support the economy.
Keeping jobs in this country.
It is our patriotic duty to buy American.
But you know who needs our support the most?
Our troops overseas.
You know what?
I'm gonna send this coat over there.
- You're not hurt?
- Yeah, I just thought that he wanted a photo.
- How's that weight loss coming?
30 pounds, three months.
- Just back off, okay?
I got it, you don't need to nag like my mother.
I am not just some machine!
As you know, I've recently discovered
Mapoo's line of hair care.
My hair looks and feels like
it belongs in a hair commercial.
Even Mr. Kitzy loves it.
Hi.
Sorry I'm late.
- It's okay.
- [Marsha] I don't wanna waste your time.
- No no, come in.
- [Marsha] This is for you.
- You shouldn't have.
Come in, come in.
I just need 15 minutes on dinner, I will just be right back.
- [Marsha] Okay, sure.
(water running)
- [Will] Hey.
- [Marsha] Oh hey.
- [Will] Check it out.
- [Marsha] Oh that's perfect.
- Ta-da!
- [Marsha] That's so nice there.
Brightens up the room.
- Yeah.
Before we eat...
- [Marsha] Yeah?
- Let's dance.
- [Marsha] No.
(laughs)
No no no no no no.
No.
I can't dance, I'm not good at this at all.
- You're great, you're doing great.
- I am just, I can't dance, I'm sorry.
It's just not gonna happen.
(romantic orchestra music)
(lively piano music)
- Wow!
Another hit for Marsha Day.
Her date video with Will is currently
the top trending video of the week!
Looks like love is blossoming between these two lovebirds.
Marsha, we need to get you and
Will on Live 'N Chat together.
Share your love with us.
(growls)
- I just love the dancing part.
I keep rewatching it over and over again.
- I'm all for getting what you want.
And girlfriend, you nabbed yourself a baller.
- I followed you all the way.
From the top of the world to the
gray area that I call my mind.
(phone rings)
- We're gonna need a maximum security presence
at the arrival point, so make sure that
back entrance is ready to go as
soon as we get out of the car.
All right, just give me a call
the second everything's clear.
Got it, I'll be in touch.
You know, Tara's not exactly thrilled
with us that we're gonna be late.
- Contour her face to hide the bloat.
- What about the dresses?
- Tara, she's up by six pounds.
- What happened?
- [Tiffany] We just weighed Marsha and Tara's pissed.
Tara's reconsidering the deal.
The deal was 30 pounds in three months.
You haven't delivered.
- You need to smooth things over with Tara.
- [Tiffany] I just do her makeup
Will, I can't work miracles.
- Hey guys, so Will is such a great guy.
He's such a real prince to Marsha, and just in
his own character, not only in just his looks.
It makes me so happy for Marsha, and I
love the relationship, but at the
same time it puts me down because
he just makes other guys seem so basic.
How will I ever find something as amazing as what they have?
- I always thought Marsha was beautiful on the inside.
And now she's actually glowing on the outside.
- Gorgeous, and then there you have it,
the look Marsha wore in her date which
is so beautiful, I love this look so much.
- [Silly Voices] The Will and Marsha Show!
It's the Will and Marsha Show!
The Will and Marsha Show!
(cartoony jazzy music)
Subscribe!
- Choo choo choo!
Perez here, and I'm on the love train!
Now I am loving Marsha and Will, and let me tell you why.
Some say it's a publicity stunt,
but I say it looks pretty real to me.
I mean just look at their eyes.
It's either real or somebody deserves an award.
And I don't think Marsha's that good of an actress.
- Hello everybody.
I just wanted to share some of my
struggles when feeding Mr. Kitzy.
He's finicky, he won't just eat anything.
I worry about his diet.
Recently I discovered Feline Royalty Gourmet,
and let me just say, Mr. Kitzy loves it.
- More energy.
(man coughing)
- [Marsha] He can't get enough of the delicious food made
only from the finest organic meats and vegetables.
It's only the best for Mr. Kitzy.
Feline Royalty Gourmet, for your precious cat.
- Cut.
Do it again.
- Hi everybody.
Quick update, I lost three pounds since last week.
Things are going well with Will.
I'm getting ready for our date tonight.
Guys, he's making dinner.
Shack Glow has been so kind to let
me try some of their new cosmetics.
(Mr. Kitzy meows)
- That's Mr. Kitzy.
I'll be right with you, baby.
(meowing)
- Their cream foundation is like a second skin.
(meowing)
He must be hungry.
Can't get enough of the Feline Gourmet Royalty.
I'll be right back.
(meowing)
- Is it okay?
- So you and Will are off the charts.
Public loves you guys.
You really met him online?
- Yeah, after a bunch of losers I finally got lucky.
- Keep taking photos with him.
- Sure.
- Parallel, engage your core, and up,
squeeze, down, up, down.
Six, two more!
Seven, one more!
Eight, that's it, that's it, that's it.
(laughs)
- You know what?
Try this.
It's my own personal energy drink recipe.
- Wow, that's really good.
- Thanks.
- You should sell this.
- You know, if you want I can send you over a couple cases.
- That's sweet of you.
- Feel free to talk about it on your channel.
If any of your subscribers want some just let me know.
(laughs)
Give me the most serious, kickass face.
You must stretch.
- After and before every workout.
Especially after actually, it's more important to do after.
- [Marsha] Why?
Boring!
- No, important.
- [Will] Real tough!
- Yeah, got my gloves on.
- Yeah, fitness face!
(laughs)
♪ I can't trust myself ♪
♪ I believe in down, down, down ♪
♪ I can't trust myself ♪
♪ I believe in down, down, down ♪
- Marsha lives here.
I can hardly breathe.
Let's try to catch her when she comes out!
- [Guard] Hey you!
What are you doing?
- [Stalker] Nothing!
- [Guard] I saw you filming stuff, this is private property.
- [Stalker] I'm just checking my messages.
- [Guard] No no no, come over here.
Hey!
- What happened to you'll be here on time?
- Sorry I'm late.
I rushed over as soon as I could.
I got this, one take only.
- You don't have time to do your nails.
I'm told you were at a restaurant earlier.
How's that weight loss coming?
- My hair is all frizzy and gross
from the summer heat, but I tried
the shampoo and conditioner from
this company called Mapoo that I
am seriously crushing on right now.
It's fantastic and made from natural ingredients
gathered from, you know, the mountains of--
- Cut.
Stick to the script, Marsha.
- Hey.
- [Marsha] Will, can I talk to you for a minute?
- Yeah.
- Tara says that we're cutting the energy drink.
We only have time for the Super Fat Blast.
- Okay.
I guess we can give it to the crew.
They seem to be working extra hard.
- The next streaming question.
Marsha, what do you like best about Will?
- Well he's just so strong and sweet.
He's perfect.
- Awwww.
Okay Will, your turn.
(dramatic atmosphere music)
- What's wrong?
You haven't said anything to me since the show wrapped.
- I told people that the drink was
gonna be featured on the show tonight.
Some of those people were potential investors.
- I didn't know you were so serious.
- I've been busting my ass to try to get distribution.
Things don't just fall into my lap like they do for you.
Come on.
I'll walk you up.
- Hi everybody!
I'm coming live so I can answer your questions.
And it looks like we have our first caller.
It's Rick.
Hi Rick.
- Hey Marsha!
Just wanted to be your first caller.
I wanna say you look fabulous!
- Thank you, Rick.
- Well we'll let you get back to your adoring fans.
Just remember to keep us along
for your next hot date with Will.
- That Rick.
Oh, we have another caller.
- [Female Fan] You and Will are so cute.
How are you guys?
- Thanks for asking.
Things are going super with Will.
I have these butterflies in my stomach and it
all made possible from your love for Will and me.
I'm just a lucky girl.
I'm trying some of Will's energy drink Durance.
From his personal recipe.
It is so good!
I have to let Mr. Kitzy try some of this.
Where are you, Mr. Kitzy?
Baby whiskers, where are you?
I know where he is.
(sobbing)
Mr. Kitzy's...
What did you put in that food?
I'm gonna sue every last cent out of you!
(sobbing)
(ominous atmosphere music)
What does this shit taste like anyway?
(coughs)
It tastes like fucking garbage.
- Marsha's done a lot for your brand.
Let's talk about this further
and not pull the plug just yet.
Marsha, pick up.
Stop the videos.
I'm containing this!
(screaming)
- Don't look at me, but look at me!
- Sorry.
(cries)
I'm so sorry!
- No, no, no, no, no!
- My cat!
My cat!
- I killed you!
I killed you with these greasy hands, Mr. Kitzy!
(ChitChat call ringing)
- Where are you?
- [Vanessa] Stop calling.
- I need to talk to Will.
- [Vanessa] I'm Vanessa, and you are?
Oh wait.
- It's important that I talk to Will.
Hi everybody.
I'm going to a gala with Will.
How you like my dress?
It's a gift from Will.
Some flowers.
Chocolates.
All from Will.
I'm a lucky girl.
Finally made it, you guys.
My subscribers are through the
roof, I work with the top brands.
My endorsement deals are pouring in.
And I'm with a hottie.
One last thing.
To all my haters.
- Now Will, the question on everyone's mind.
Is it really over with Marsha?
- You know, unfortunately it is.
I really thought it was the
beginning of something beautiful.
- You know, there are some skeptics
out there who don't believe it was real.
Some think it was a prank on your part.
Didn't you feel completely mismatched with Marsha?
I mean you're a Dartmouth grad,
highly successful, a good looking guy.
What could you have possibly seen in Marsha?
- [Will] Well everything was 100% real.
I really wanted to get to know Marsha.
- [Rick] Can I get a recipe, Will?
- [Will] Not a chance Rick, it's a secret.
But I will tell you that it is full of
nutrition, packed with vitamins and minerals.
- Well thanks to Will everyone's
getting a case of the energy drink.
Let's thank him.
And for those of you at home who are
interested you can visit Will's personal
website to find out how to place an order.
- [Will] I saw sides of her that weren't exactly pretty.
She's arrogant, she's highly insecure, she's materialistic.
All of her problems could be fixed if she
just stopped the constant eating and got up off
her lazy ass and went to the gym every day.
- That's why this country's gone to shit.
Nobody cares about the fucking news anymore,
nobody cares about the problems in
this country or how to solve them.
All anybody cares about, the news today,
is some ugly fat chick who can't
get a fucking boyfriend on her own.
- America's a free country, not a commie state.
She can do what she wants, she can say what she wants.
- She's a slut.
- She ate me out for rent.
- They look so disgusting, you know
they aren't taking care of themselves.
- Seriously guys, stop hating on her.
- Is that a man in a wig?
(laughs)
- I'm praying for you all.
- Hey guys, I'm back, and I just wanna
say that I called this from a mile away.
Marsha got way too big for her own good.
She let the fame get to her head
and she's lost her values and her morals.
But do I feel bad saying this?
Kinda.
Nobody deserves this much hate,
and I'm sure she does feel bad
about what happened to her cat.
I mean she must right?
So let's just pray that she works
through this and finds her way again.
She will.
Maybe not.
- Bye.
- It's call karma, you stupid bitch.
- You sold out your soul and you sold out your cat.
And I hope you rot in Hell!
- Call me, Will.
- Hi Will! - Hi Will!
- We want you to take us to prom, and we
don't even mind sharing you for the night.
- Mmm-mmm-mmm.
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm.
(lighthearted atmosphere music)
- We are all on the wheel of the cosmic karma.
- She's a parasite.
And she's gonna be a drain on Medicare.
- You should get cancer.
And die.
- And get off the internet.
I don't have the time for you.
And I'm not willing to unsubscribe
to everything, so just stop posting.
- You don't know how tough it is to
be overweight in this country.
I'm sick of all the fat jokes.
You think it's funny?
I'm telling you it's not.
Worse than all that is when I'm treated like I'm invisible.
- This is to all the people who
have been with me from the beginning.
Namaste.
(erratic techno music)
(vomiting)
(toilet flushes)
- Hey I think that's her.
- Yeah I think so too.
- [Female Harasser] Wow, you look so much uglier in person.
(sniffing)
Do you smell that?
- [Male Harasser] Phew, I smell it too.
- [Female Harasser] It's from Marsha.
- [Male Harasser] I think Marsha passed wind.
- [Female Harasser] Hey look at the flab on her.
- Shut the fuck up!
(snickering)
- Marsha Day?
- What do you want?
What is this?
- You've been served.
- [Marsha] What do you mean they're
suing me for defamation and damages?
- [Lawyer] Feline Royalty wants a public apology.
- The hell I will!
- [Lawyer] Marsha, you have to take this seriously.
We'll need the $50,000 retainer in full.
(knocking)
- [Landlord] You in there?
(knocking)
The collection agency keeps calling me.
Pick up the phone and answer them the hell yourself!
- Did you see the look on his face?
- It's Marsha Day!
- [Fan] Oh hey Marsha, can we get a photo?
- Know what, it's late.
Thanks, but...
- That's so rude.
- Hey don't leave.
Those are nice, let me try them.
- That looks wonderful.
- Pictures, pictures!
- Cheese!
Me me me me me me!
(laughter)
- Come on.
- Thank you guys, thank you so much, I have to...
All right, stop!
No!
(laughter)
Thanks for the picture!
(sobbing)
(dramatic orchestra music)
(ominous atmosphere music)
- Hi.
(shrieks)
- [Marsha] Get out!
Get out!
(door closes)
- [Tara] Our agency's no longer responsible
for your public relations, your housing--
- [Marsha] Just tell me what I need to do.
Just tell me, I'll do it.
- I've let go of your bodyguard.
Our management company, our contract.
- No, fuck you!
Fuck you!
What about all the work that I did for the brands?
I'm just used and tossed away like that, what the hell?
- [Tara] You blew it.
- Go fuck yourself!
(door slams)
Hi everybody.
I know you've been concerned with my behavior lately.
It's true, Will and I have broken up for some time.
I just wanna close that chapter in my life.
I wish him well.
The hardest time in my life has been losing my cat.
I alone am responsible for his care.
I was rash in blaming Feline Royalty Gourmet
regarding the quality of their
product and made unfound statements.
I can only say that my grief and guilt
overwhelmed me and I lashed out inappropriately.
(dramatic acoustic guitar music)
- [Will] Hey.
- [Marsha] Hi.
- [Will] Check it out.
- [Marsha] Oh that's perfect.
- [Will] Ta-da!
- [Marsha] Oh that's so nice there.
Brightens up the room.
- [Will] Before we eat.
- [Marsha] Yeah?
- [Will] Let's dance.
- [Marsha] No.
(laughs)
No no no no no no.
I don't dance.
I'm not good at this at all.
- [Will] You're great, you're doing great.
- [Marsha] I am just--
(mouse click)
(laughter)
- So...
- I might go play some basketball, I really like basketball.
- Oh cool.
- It's hard to play sometimes because the places
we go play they have referees and stuff like that.
Sometimes you don't have enough players.
(laughs)
And I was in a fraternity.
That was a lot of fun times there.
Mainly getting drunk.
- Thank you for coming down here.
- I don't wanna waste each other's time.
- Let's double your cut.
Why can't I have what I want?
- It's a racist, sexist world, what do you expect?
How would a comeback change anything?
- I don't know.
The only thing that makes sense now is if I win.
(lighthearted orchestra music)
(Marsha's parents arguing)
(rock music)
(phone ringing)
- Tara, what's up?
- [Tara] Hey, there's a deal, Marsha.
- What, what is it?
- [Tara] You got the stomach for it?
(lively piano music)
- Everyone, as promised, we have a true exclusive here.
Who could forget the drama of Marsha Day and Will Durham?
The romance, the lies, the cray-cray messy breakup.
Today both of them are making an
appearance on the show, let's welcome them!
- I knew you were fame hungry,
but this is a whole new level.
- Really?
Coming from you?
- Didn't you get everything you asked for?
Wasn't I everything that you wanted?
- A lying cheat?
I knew about Vanessa.
Tell me, were you sleeping with her all along?
- We're back together.
(shrieks)
- How did this happen, share.
- Well actually we ran into each other
by accident and I realized my feelings
were still really raw even after all this time.
- Mine too.
- And I had to ask myself, is it really over?
Shouldn't it not hurt, but it still hurt like heck.
- I saw him and the sparks were still there.
- People shell out for vacation, getting married.
Buying a home, furnishing, decorating it, raising kids.
That's what everyone buys into.
I have serious offers from the big players
in bridal, vacation, household products.
Marsha, they want you and Will back together for this.
- It's like the Hope Diamond!
- Ooooh you guys, congratulations!
- We're talking about a multi-year structured deal.
Altogether it's high seven figures.
With bonuses over five years.
Think about it.
- Marsha, you have no idea what a real relationship is.
I was just...
I was just a trophy for you.
That's all I ever was.
- The deal is what it is.
Name your number, everybody has a price.
- 65%.
- Fine.
- Marsha and Will, you are blowing us away!
Our channels are literally exploding with comments!
Everyone is so happy for you!
- Thank you everybody, really.
Will and I are just so excited
to be joining our lives together.
- You must be so busy planning the wedding.
Do you have a date?
More importantly, when's the honeymoon?
Wink wink!
- Actually, our wedding and honeymoon
depend on a very precious one.
I'm expecting our first child.
We're having a baby!
(Rick clapping)
- [Rick] O-M-G!
Congratulations, congratulations!
This is huge, this is big news!
Everyone, you heard it here first
on Live 'N Chat, Marsha Day, Will Durham
expecting a baby, right here, right now.
We are so happy for you.
Congratulations.
This is blowing my mind.
(dramatic orchestra music)
(hip hop music)
♪ Hey babe ♪
♪ I do it just how you like it ♪
♪ You've been more concerned with what I'm liking ♪
♪ You've been all caught up in who's been sliding ♪
♪ All up my DMs ♪
♪ Sending me the screenshot when it don't make sense ♪
♪ Making me regret I ever let you in ♪
♪ Getting on my nerves with all the messages ♪
♪ Please don't waste my time ♪
♪ You're so busy worried about who's on my line ♪
♪ Every time I think that we could be just fine ♪
♪ You go and let me down ♪
♪ Stalking on my network when I'm not around ♪
♪ You're the only lover that is in my head ♪
♪ But you would rather be up in my phone instead ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Trust me, trust me now ♪
♪ But you would rather bust me, bust me out ♪
♪ When you come around, the only ♪
♪ Thing you ever seem to care about ♪
♪ Is silly shit like ♪
♪ Who is that on my line ♪
♪ What took me so long to hit you back this time ♪
♪ I'mma need for you to please make up your mind ♪
♪ Or I'mma cut you loose and won't look back this time ♪
♪ Hey babe ♪
♪ You know you used to excite me ♪
♪ Used to make me wanna stay in on a Friday ♪
♪ Now I swear the only thing you do is try me ♪
♪ I can't take no more ♪
♪ All these silly things that I just can't ignore ♪
♪ You're the only one that's ever had my heart ♪
♪ But you don't even seem to care about that part ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ I'm way above the fuck shit ♪
♪ Super positive and not the one you wanna fuck with ♪
♪ Ballin' like Lebron ♪
♪ You niggas ballin' on a budget ♪
♪ They say shit on the net that ♪
♪ They would never say in public ♪
♪ I don't understand sometimes ♪
♪ I'm still minding my business ♪
♪ You all on my Instagram checking out how I'm living ♪
♪ I got hella bitches, you still in your mama's kitchen ♪
♪ I been first class flights to the A plane tripping ♪
♪ I ain't tripping, no ♪
♪ I be in my mode when I hit the road ♪
♪ Barely pay attention when they hit my phone ♪
♪ But I'm for my city when I'm on the go ♪
♪ I don't got time for them nonsense ♪
♪ Fuck is an Instagram comment ♪
♪ We out here moving like comets ♪
♪ Checking these commas ♪
♪ Tell 'em miss me with the drama ♪
♪ We don't want none of that fuck shit around ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ Wrong things ♪
♪ Worried about the wrong things ♪
♪ She's a city girl ♪
♪ Nothing but a pretty girl ♪
♪ I found you in a different world ♪
♪ You're rolling down Collins ♪
♪ She a 50s girl ♪
♪ She always getting trippy, girl ♪
♪ I found you in a different world ♪
♪ Rolling down Collins ♪
♪ We always rolling ♪
♪ I look at you, I see emotion ♪
♪ Girl sip this potion ♪
♪ So good ♪
♪ Rolling down Collins ♪
♪ But we on the low, I'm sipping slow ♪
♪ I look at you, you in control ♪
♪ Let's take a stroll ♪
♪ So good ♪
♪ Rolling down Collins ♪
♪ So if you close your eyes ♪
♪ I'll show your secrets no one knows about ♪
♪ And all the boundaries will be lost and found ♪
♪ And will remain forever ♪
♪ Memories can't harm me now ♪
♪ They matter no more ♪
♪ Just you and me ♪
♪ Now we've come this far ♪
♪ I'm ready to let it go ♪
♪ So if you close your eyes ♪
♪ I'll show you secrets no one knows about ♪
♪ And all the boundaries will be lost and found ♪
♪ And will remain forever ♪
♪ So if you hold my hand ♪
♪ I'll show you secrets I have locked away ♪
♪ And our hope will be reborn again ♪
♪ And will remain forever ♪
♪ So if you close your eyes ♪
♪ I'll show you secrets no one knows about ♪
♪ And all the boundaries will be lost and found ♪
♪ And will remain forever ♪
♪ So if you hold my hand ♪
♪ I'll show you secrets I have locked away ♪
♪ And our hope will be reborn again ♪
♪ And will remain forever ♪